Some lost feelings..

Edited to add: Very regional post ahead. Please pardon. Could not get it out in any other language.

It is Onam.

3 days of celebrations... and 10 days of preparation for that.

--Ammamma overseeing the quality of mud used to make mather/ thrikkakkara appan, and allowing us to make small utensils with mud to be kept around the mather. The pleasure of compring the neatness of small mathers' with sister and cousins

--Waking upto find dusted and polished "pookkooda"( flower basket) kept outside the verandah, ready to be picked up and dash off.

...scurrying to pluck the best flowers before the neighbour's kids get at them.

-- turning up our nose at the circle of plastered cowdung to put pookkalam, and forgetting about it as soon as the pookkalam takes shape

--Sticking flowers into tiny sticks and balancing them precariously around the mather. Selecting the best flower of the day to go right on top.

--The fun of crushing ladies fingers leaves into the arimaavu/ kolam maavu to make it easier to write the names. Watching mom write down all our names and stars around the Matheru. Watching the list get bigger each year with new kids being added to it...

The pookkalam and sadya were a given. That would happen anyway.

It was these small moments that made our onam.

Now, for Onam, we make pookkalam with market bought flowers, make sadya with all the dishes, but these small moments are what i miss giving my son.

Today he knows Onam as a festival. Someday, i hope he understands the spirit of Onam as i did.

Till then, we will live in this farce of a celebration.

Ignore my rants ..... Go ahead and have a happy and properous Onam.