Just need that push!

What does one do when he/ she knows what their weakness is? What does one do when you know your weakness is taking over your life.

In my case, nothing. I just sit and wait, and regret. And this has been going on for as long as i remember. And my sin- COMPLACENCY!!!

Dictionary defines complacency as " a feeling of quiet pleasure or security, often while unaware of some potential danger, defect, or the like; self-satisfaction or smug satisfaction with an existing situation, condition, etc. ".The only difference is that i am fully aware of the consequences and potential dangers. I just don't feel like reacting.

Over the years , i have realized something, i work best under pressure. Gimme loads of work and no time and i end up completing them, feeling a great sense of satisfaction . It is madness while it lasts, but the results are always worth it. I have moved from a role that thrust me into madness very often to a role that is quite laid back about a year ago.
I seem to be unable to get used to having ample time in hand...i just slip into complacency. I have work to do....deadlines to meet, targets to be met. But there is just so much time, it always gets put away. It's getting out of hand, i know it! Just need a jolt to shake me up.

Maybe i should go back to practising meditation again( that stuff i regularly did till about 8 years ago). The worst part is when this complacent phase is over and i realize how much i could have done in this time! It is times like this that i hate my guts....Its about time i saved myself some misery and rebound.

Starting NOW!!!